Are You Distancing Yourself from True North
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How often do you compromise your standards by settling for less in life Do you allow certain people to treat you poorly or with disrespect Have you ever settled for lower quality in an item that you purchased because you didn t want to complain Have you accepted something that fell short of what you asked for and not attempted to correct the situation Whenever we allow ourselves to be treated this way and accept what is instead of what could be, we are making choices that further distance us from our True North and the life we deserve a life of self-respect and honor
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When We Fail to Compromise Up
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Here are three real-world examples taken from different workshops I ve led (names have been changed) showing what can happen and how our lives take shape, moving us further from True North, when we fail to compromise up:
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Josh purchased a digital video camera at a reputable and well-known electronics store Just 2 days after he bought the camera, one of the programming functions stopped working reliably Josh convinced himself that the retailer would have frowned on a return or refund, since this had been the last camera in stock, so he talked himself into accepting the lower-quality item for which he had paid full price He told himself that he d just make do and take his chances with the programming function, or use his friend s digital video camera when there was something important that he wanted to record Clearly Josh lacked the nerve to approach the retailer from which he had purchased the faulty equipment and ask for what he rightly deserved a new camera or a refund Instead, Josh settled for less, and that s exactly what he got
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Laura and her husband, Jeff, had been hearing about a great new seafood
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restaurant in the city There was lots of buzz about the restaurant s chef and his special lobster creations So they decided to give it a try on their tenth
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If You re Going to Compromise, Compromise Up! wedding anniversary For dinner, Laura ordered the house specialty, a lobster and pasta dish, and was disappointed The lobster was barely warm, and the pasta was overcooked Also, Laura had specified that she didn t want garlic in her dish, and there was lots of garlic On top of all this, the la carte dish cost $45 When Laura s husband sensed that she was dissatisfied, he offered to ask their server to correct the problem, but Laura objected She tried to convince her husband that the problem was no big deal and that she could live with the cold, limp, garlicky seafood dinner Obviously, Laura felt intimidated by the restaurant s tony surroundings and formallooking waitstaff She was sure that their waiter would be angry at her disapproval of the meal after all, no one else seemed to be complaining Laura settled for less, and that s exactly what she got
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Meg s mother fell seriously ill and was hospitalized Although the hospital
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had received a high ranking for medical treatment, consistent patient care was another story Meg felt that the hospital staff seemed cold and insensitive The duty nurse assigned to her mother s floor was a man who was easily irritated by the smallest request, and the hospital admitting office was rude and short with Meg when she admitted her mother, even though it was clear that Meg was distracted and concerned about her mother s condition When the night shift started and the same ill-tempered nurse snapped at Meg s mother for requesting an additional blanket for her bed, Meg stood by in disbelief as her mother, looking hurt and angry, recoiled with tears in her eyes But Meg said nothing She later consoled her mother for what had happened, but she never addressed the issue with the nurse himself or his supervisor Meg s own insecurity about speaking up on behalf of her mother made her feel that if she said something about her mother s poor treatment, the entire nursing staff would be angry with her, and then what She d have to face these people every day, and that would be too uncomfortable to bear Meg settled for less when it came to her mother s hospital care, and that s what her mother received
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